Independents

Squirrel Spotting: Reach Out and Touch Someone

IndependentsJul 24, 2019

Squirrel Spotting: Reach Out and Touch Someone

Peter Smith’s latest column on the importance of physical contact will have you streaming Motown’s greatest hits in no time.

2019_NEW_Peter_Smith_copy_copy.jpg
Peter Smith is president of Memoire and author of two books, “Hiring Squirrels,” and “Sell Something.” Connect with Smith on LinkedIn or at dublinsmith@yahoo.com.

I love the Four Tops song “Reach Out (I’ll Be There).”

It’s got everything a great song needs—Levi Stubbs’ plaintive vocals, a great, driving bass line, wonderful lyrics and sublime harmonies.

In many ways, it could be the signature tune for Detroit, the city that gave us the Four Tops and that great Motown sound.

The song could also serve as the signature song for one of the most important disciplines in sales—touching our customers.

WATCH: The Four Tops, “Reach Out (I’ll Be There)”


Lawrence D. Rosenblum wrote in “See What I’m Saying” that: “When we touch someone, you activate a strip of your brain that runs from a spot just above your ears all the way to the top of your head. Touching also activates higher-level brain areas needed for recognition and reaction.”

Rosenblum echoes findings from the social-science community that frequently cite touching as a primary means to meaningful human connection.

Additionally, touching is a powerful way to combat anxiety and stress (guy shopping for an engagement ring perhaps?). There’s a reason we hug our children and our loved ones when they suffer setbacks, or physical or emotional pain. We’ve been making “boo-boos” go away for … well, it depends on how old you are.

Now, don’t think for a minute I’m suggesting we walk around all day hugging customers. Can you imagine?

Customer: “Hi. Do you guys change watch batteries?”

You: “As a matter of fact, we do. Now come over here and give me a hug!”

Yes? No? Probably not. How about this one:

Customer: “I’m upset that the prong on my ring appears to be broken.”

You: “Well, let’s hug a minute, and then I’ll take a look.”

Like I said, we can’t go around all day hugging everyone, but we should try to touch people at every opportunity, and the good news is that in jewelry stores, we get lots and lots of opportunities to do exactly that.

For instance, shaking hands can be the most natural thing in the world if conducted with authenticity (or a contrived gimmick if mandated across the board).

Decide for yourself when it feels right, and do it properly when you are doing it. Nothing feels worse than a bad handshake.

In “First Impressions,” Ann Demarais and Valerie White wrote about handshakes: “Their [social-psychologists’] findings indicate that a firm handshake, characterized by strength, vigor, duration, eye contact and completeness
of grip, does have a positive impact on a person’s first impression.”

I’ll add to that: If you’re a finger-breaker, get over yourself. We’re supposed to be connecting in a way that is good for two people, not auditioning to become a bricklayer.

Two additional and socially acceptable means of touching include the shoulder and the elbow.

It is perfectly fine to engage in a light touch of either and, needless to say, it’s a whole lot easier to do if you are on the same side of the counter as the customer. What a concept!

And, finally, the most obvious and appropriate means of touching your customer is when helping them to try on jewelry.

Necklaces, earrings, bracelets and rings all provide obvious and organic ways for appropriate human-to-human touching, and getting jewelry on customers is always a good idea.

We’ll leave the final word on this to Leonard Mlodinow, who wrote in “Subliminal: How Your Unconscious Mind Rules Your Behavior” that, “Scientists have discovered a particular kind of nerve fiber in the people’s skin—especially in the face and arms—that appears to have developed specifically to transmit the pleasantness of social touch.”

Now, if we could just put a tune to that and have Levi Stubbs sing it …

Peter Smith is president of Memoire and author of two books, “Hiring Squirrels: 12 Essential Interview Questions to Uncover Great Retail Sales Talent,” and “Sell Something: Principles and Perspectives for Engaged Retail Salespeople.” Both books are available in print or Kindle at Amazon.com. Connect with Smith on LinkedIn or at dublinsmith@yahoo.com.
Peter Smithis an industry consultant, speaker, and sales trainer, and author of 3 books on sales. Reach him at TheRetailSmiths@gmail.com.

The Latest

Astrid & Miyu 2025 12-Day, 24-Day, Solid Gold Advent Calendars
CollectionsOct 10, 2025
Count Down to the Holidays With Astrid & Miyu’s Advent Calendars

The trio of Advent calendars include a version with 18-karat gold and lab-grown diamond jewelry in a red lacquer jewelry box.

Front of Marla Aaron porcelain Nymphenburg Lock
CollectionsOct 10, 2025
Piece of the Week: Marla Aaron’s ‘Nymphenburg Lock’

Created in collaboration with Nymphenburg Porcelain, the lock is part of a four-piece collection that took two years to bring to fruition.

Alisa Bunger Frederick Goldman
MajorsOct 10, 2025
Frederick Goldman Names New VP of Sales

Jewelry industry veteran Alisa Bunger has taken on the role.

LIM-401 2024 National Jeweler Supplier Bulletin- iD100 Web and Eblast FINAL (2) (1).jpg
Brought to you by
Protect Your Customers and Your Business

You deserve to know what you are selling–to protect your customers as well as your business and your reputation.

Feriel Zerouki, De Beers Chief Trade and Industry Officer
SourcingOct 09, 2025
Feriel Zerouki Is Leaving De Beers

The company and industry leader’s two-decade tenure with De Beers will come to a close at the end of the month.

Weekly QuizOct 09, 2025
This Week’s Quiz
Test your jewelry news knowledge by answering these questions.
Take the Quiz
Fabergé Imperial Winter Egg
AuctionsOct 09, 2025
This Fabergé Egg Could Crack $27M At Auction

“The Winter Egg” set the world auction record for a Fabergé piece twice at previous Christie’s sales.

Kessler watch battery recycling program
MajorsOct 09, 2025
Sy Kessler Buying Watch Batteries as Silver Hits Record High

The company will pay 1.5x silver’s current spot price for each pound of silver oxide batteries submitted.

ja_fall_2024_by_headshot_stories_6824.jpg
Brought to you by
JA New York Fall Is Right Around the Corner

The upcoming show provides savvy retailers with the opportunity to stock their cases with best sellers in advance of the holiday season.

Katkim Men’s Collection Shadow Pendant Necklace and Anerise Signet Band
CollectionsOct 09, 2025
Katkim Launches First Men’s Collection

The line includes a “Shadow” series crafted exclusively for the new men’s offering and reimagined styles from the brand’s core collections.

Gemfields Rough Rubies
SourcingOct 09, 2025
Gemfields’ Mini Mixed-Quality Ruby Auction Garners $11M

The rough on offer was recovered from a newer area at the Montepuez mine.

“Storied Diamond Desert Sands of Eternity” engagement ring and wedding band
SourcingOct 08, 2025
In ‘Storied Diamond,’ Jared Jewelers Is Emphasizing the Journey

The retailer’s new collection of engagement rings and fashion jewelry is set with natural diamonds that are traceable via blockchain.

Emily P. Wheeler Ombré Collection Campaign
CollectionsOct 08, 2025
Emily P. Wheeler Shifts Into Neutral for Latest ‘Ombré’ Collection

The champagne colorway in her newest “Ombré” collection combines white and trendy brown diamonds, a departure from her usual vibrant hues.

MRK x MFA Tsuba Charm Necklace Collection Campaign
CollectionsOct 08, 2025
Tsuba Designs Inspire Monica Rich Kosann’s New Charms

Kosann partnered with the Museum of Fine Arts, Boston, to create a set of necklaces inspired by the artwork on samurai sword handguards.

Stock image of a gavel and law books
CrimeOct 07, 2025
Men Who Posed as Utility Workers Found Guilty in Jeweler’s Murder

Carlos Jose Hernandez and Joshua Zuazo face life in prison for the October 2024 murder of 72-year-old Detroit-area jeweler Hussein Murray.

Zoë Kravitz Wearing Jessica McCormack Tempest Sapphire Pendant and Tempest Diamond Necklace
CollectionsOct 07, 2025
Jessica McCormack Looks to Sea Spirits for ‘Tempest’ Collection

The brand’s first high jewelry collection, “Tempest” plays with movement while calling to mind the folklore of the sea.

Lightning Ridge Rural Fire Brigade
SourcingOct 07, 2025
Columbia Gem House Announces ‘Opals for Outback Heroes’ Fundraiser

Proceeds from its jewelry raffle will go to a volunteer-run fire and rescue group in the Lightning Ridge area of New South Wales, Australia.

Stuller 2025 S.E.R.V.E. Star Awards winners
MajorsOct 07, 2025
Stuller Names Its S.E.R.V.E Stars for 2025

Stuller said the recipients embody the company’s core values, which include community participation and personal and professional growth.

All four models of Citizen’s new Rainell watch
WatchesOct 06, 2025
This Fall, Citizen’s Forecast Calls for Rain

Citizen’s new “Rainell” women’s watch has a raindrop-shaped case and is available with a silver-, gold-, purple-, or green-colored dial.

Mercedes Gleitze Rolex Oyster 1926
AuctionsOct 06, 2025
The ‘Rolex That Made Rolex’ Heads to Auction at Sotheby’s

The “Mercedes Gleitze Rolex Oyster,” named for the British endurance swimmer who made it famous, will go up for sale next month.

Amit Pratihari GIA India
GradingOct 06, 2025
GIA India Names Former De Beers Exec as New Managing Director

Amit Pratihari was previously the managing director of De Beers India and Forevermark India.

DCWC 2025 Board of Directors
SourcingOct 06, 2025
SoCal 24 Karat Club Integrates Into Diamond Club West Coast

Members of the Jewelers 24 Karat Club of Southern California will gain access to expanded services, resources, and connections, DCWC said.

Selena Gomez and Benny Blanco Wedding, Jacob & Co. Watch
TrendsOct 03, 2025
Selena Gomez, Benny Blanco Tie the Knot Wearing Diamonds, White Metals

Gomez’s jewelry included Tiffany & Co. drop-style earrings while Blanco stacked diamonds from Jacob & Co. on his wrist.

HRD Antwerp CEO Paul De Wachter
GradingOct 03, 2025
Grading Lab HRD Antwerp Names New CEO

Diamond industry banking veteran Paul De Wachter will take on the role in January 2026.

Taylor Swift Kallati sapphire ring
TrendsOct 03, 2025
Piece of the Week: Kallati’s Pink Sapphire Ring

Taylor Swift flaunts an Elizabeth Taylor-esque gemstone in promo for her new album, “The Life of a Showgirl.”

Boucheron Quatre Sand Collection
CollectionsOct 02, 2025
Boucheron Debuts Cuffs Crafted With 3D-Printed Sand

Its “Quantre Sand” capsule was made using a 3D sand printing technique borrowed from the automotive and aeronautics industries.

Stock image of crime scene tape
CrimeOct 02, 2025
$1M in Jewelry Stolen in Northern California Smash and Grab

Four individuals have been charged in the “takeover-style” robbery of Heller Jewelers last month, and additional charges are expected.

Neil Lane and Boucheron bow tie brooch
MajorsOct 02, 2025
Neil Lane Jewelry Exhibition Coming to Toledo Museum of Art

“Radiance and Reverie” will showcase more than 150 jewels from Lane’s personal collection by Tiffany & Co., Cartier, and more.

×

This site uses cookies to give you the best online experience. By continuing to use & browse this site, we assume you agree to our Privacy Policy