CollectionsJun 13, 2025
Piece of the Week: Robinson Pelham’s Pear EarringsTake a bite out of the 14-karat yellow gold “Fruits of Love Pear” earrings featuring peridots, diamond stems, and tsavorite leaves.
IndependentsJul 24, 2019
Squirrel Spotting: Reach Out and Touch Someone
Peter Smith’s latest column on the importance of physical contact will have you streaming Motown’s greatest hits in no time.
Peter Smith is president of Memoire and author of two books, “Hiring Squirrels,” and “Sell Something.” Connect with Smith on LinkedIn or at dublinsmith@yahoo.com.
I love the Four Tops song “Reach Out (I’ll Be There).”
It’s got everything a great song needs—Levi Stubbs’ plaintive vocals, a great, driving bass line, wonderful lyrics and sublime harmonies.
In many ways, it could be the signature tune for Detroit, the city that gave us the Four Tops and that great Motown sound.
The song could also serve as the signature song for one of the most important disciplines in sales—touching our customers.
WATCH: The Four Tops, “Reach Out (I’ll Be There)”
Lawrence D. Rosenblum wrote in “See What I’m Saying” that: “When we touch someone, you activate a strip of your brain that runs from a spot just above your ears all the way to the top of your head. Touching also activates higher-level brain areas needed for recognition and reaction.”
Rosenblum echoes findings from the social-science community that frequently cite touching as a primary means to meaningful human connection.
Additionally, touching is a powerful way to combat anxiety and stress (guy shopping for an engagement ring perhaps?). There’s a reason we hug our children and our loved ones when they suffer setbacks, or physical or emotional pain. We’ve been making “boo-boos” go away for … well, it depends on how old you are.
Now, don’t think for a minute I’m suggesting we walk around all day hugging customers. Can you imagine?
Customer: “Hi. Do you guys change watch batteries?”
You: “As a matter of fact, we do. Now come over here and give me a hug!”
Yes? No? Probably not. How about this one:
Customer: “I’m upset that the prong on my ring appears to be broken.”
You: “Well, let’s hug a minute, and then I’ll take a look.”
Like I said, we can’t go around all day hugging everyone, but we should try to touch people at every opportunity, and the good news is that in jewelry stores, we get lots and lots of opportunities to do exactly that.
For instance, shaking hands can be the most natural thing in the world if conducted with authenticity (or a contrived gimmick if mandated across the board).
Decide for yourself when it feels right, and do it properly when you are doing it. Nothing feels worse than a bad handshake.
In “First Impressions,” Ann Demarais and Valerie White wrote about handshakes: “Their [social-psychologists’] findings indicate that a firm handshake, characterized by strength, vigor, duration, eye contact and completeness
of grip, does have a positive impact on a person’s first impression.”
I’ll add to that: If you’re a finger-breaker, get over yourself. We’re supposed to be connecting in a way that is good for two people, not auditioning to become a bricklayer.
Two additional and socially acceptable means of touching include the shoulder and the elbow.
It is perfectly fine to engage in a light touch of either and, needless to say, it’s a whole lot easier to do if you are on the same side of the counter as the customer. What a concept!
And, finally, the most obvious and appropriate means of touching your customer is when helping them to try on jewelry.
Necklaces, earrings, bracelets and rings all provide obvious and organic ways for appropriate human-to-human touching, and getting jewelry on customers is always a good idea.
We’ll leave the final word on this to Leonard Mlodinow, who wrote in “Subliminal: How Your Unconscious Mind Rules Your Behavior” that, “Scientists have discovered a particular kind of nerve fiber in the people’s skin—especially in the face and arms—that appears to have developed specifically to transmit the pleasantness of social touch.”
Now, if we could just put a tune to that and have Levi Stubbs sing it …
Peter Smith is president of Memoire and author of two books, “Hiring Squirrels: 12 Essential Interview Questions to Uncover Great Retail Sales Talent,” and “Sell Something: Principles and Perspectives for Engaged Retail Salespeople.” Both books are available in print or Kindle at Amazon.com. Connect with Smith on LinkedIn or at dublinsmith@yahoo.com.
I’ll add to that: If you’re a finger-breaker, get over yourself. We’re supposed to be connecting in a way that is good for two people, not auditioning to become a bricklayer.
Two additional and socially acceptable means of touching include the shoulder and the elbow.
It is perfectly fine to engage in a light touch of either and, needless to say, it’s a whole lot easier to do if you are on the same side of the counter as the customer. What a concept!
And, finally, the most obvious and appropriate means of touching your customer is when helping them to try on jewelry.
Necklaces, earrings, bracelets and rings all provide obvious and organic ways for appropriate human-to-human touching, and getting jewelry on customers is always a good idea.
We’ll leave the final word on this to Leonard Mlodinow, who wrote in “Subliminal: How Your Unconscious Mind Rules Your Behavior” that, “Scientists have discovered a particular kind of nerve fiber in the people’s skin—especially in the face and arms—that appears to have developed specifically to transmit the pleasantness of social touch.”
Now, if we could just put a tune to that and have Levi Stubbs sing it …
Peter Smith is president of Memoire and author of two books, “Hiring Squirrels: 12 Essential Interview Questions to Uncover Great Retail Sales Talent,” and “Sell Something: Principles and Perspectives for Engaged Retail Salespeople.” Both books are available in print or Kindle at Amazon.com. Connect with Smith on LinkedIn or at dublinsmith@yahoo.com.
More on Independents
The Latest
Events & AwardsJun 13, 2025
AGA to Host ‘Diamonds From Mine to Market’ Education ConferenceThe one-day virtual event will feature speakers from De Beers, GIA, and Gemworld International.
EditorsJun 12, 2025
15 Questions With Jewelry Photographer Ella SophieThe California-based creative talks jewelry photography in the modern era and tackles FAQs about working with a pro for the first time.
Brought to you by
Jewelers of America is Headed to Las Vegas for JCK 2025The countdown is on for the JCK Las Vegas Show and JA is pulling out all the stops.
AuctionsJun 12, 2025
Vintage Patek Philippe From the ‘50s Sells for $4M at Sotheby’s Al Capone’s pocket watch also found a buyer, though it went for less than half of what it did at auction four years ago.
Weekly QuizJun 12, 2025
This Week’s QuizTest your jewelry news knowledge by answering these questions.
Events & AwardsJun 12, 2025
Gabriel Love Foundation Introduces Scholarship Honoring Elias GabrielThe foundation has also expanded its “Stronger Together” initiative with Jewelers for Children.
AuctionsJun 12, 2025
Former De Beers Exec Celine Assimon Joins BonhamsAssimon is the auction house’s new chief commercial officer.
Brought to you by
The True Power Behind the Counter: Why Sales Associates Are the Heart of the Jewelry BusinessWhen investing in your jewelry business, it's important not to overlook the most crucial element of success: the sales associates.
EditorsJun 11, 2025
Q&A: Al Cook on Differentiating Natural Diamonds, Traceability, and TariffsThe De Beers Group CEO discusses the company’s new “beacon” program, the likelihood diamonds will be exempt from tariffs, and “Origin.”
MajorsJun 11, 2025
Pandora Bets on Las Vegas for First North American FlagshipThe Danish jewelry giant hosted its grand opening last weekend, complete with a Pandora pink roulette wheel.
GradingJun 11, 2025
Tiffany Stevens Exits IGI, Lab Appoints New Board LeaderIndustry veteran Anoop Mehta is the new chairman and independent director of the IGI board.
Events & AwardsJun 11, 2025
Kering Announces Winners of Sustainability-Focused AwardThe winners of the inaugural “Kering Generation Award x Jewelry” are student Lee Min Seo and China-based startup Ianyan.
SourcingJun 10, 2025
De Beers Turns to Brown, Yellow Diamonds for New ‘Beacon’“Ombré Desert Diamonds” will emphasize cream-, champagne-, and brown-colored diamonds, shades that set natural stones apart from lab grown.
AuctionsJun 10, 2025
Noonans to Auction 16th-Century Signet RingIt's one of the “Gresham grasshopper” rings English financier Sir Thomas Gresham was known to gift to acquaintances or business associates.
CollectionsJun 10, 2025
Tabayer Names Mary Chiam as CEOThe brand also debuted its new “Zorae” collection featuring a talisman of protection and harmony inspired by a sheaf of wheat.
MajorsJun 10, 2025
Lauren Johansen Joins Loudr As Loudr’s new account manager, Johansen will partner with clients to craft and execute marketing strategies.
Events & AwardsJun 09, 2025
And the Winners of the 2025 Couture Design Awards Are … Designers were recognized in 12 categories, from platinum to pearls, before the evening ended with a new, retail-focused award.
AuctionsJun 09, 2025
Nancy Astor’s Cartier Tiara Sells for $1.2MThe rare turquoise and diamond jewel was the top lot at Bonhams’ June jewelry sale.
Events & AwardsJun 09, 2025
CASE Awards Now Accepting Entries For 2025The deadline to submit is June 16.
MajorsJun 09, 2025
RDI Diamonds Partners With LavalierThe diamond wholesaler is working with the insurance provider to seamlessly offer personal jewelry insurance to RDI retailers’ clients.
CollectionsJun 06, 2025
Piece of the Week: Harwell Godfrey’s ‘Granny Squares Eleanor’ Necklace As an homage to iconic crochet blankets, the necklace features the nostalgic motif through a kaleidoscope of cabochon-cut stones.
Events & AwardsJun 05, 2025
The 12 Fresh Faces in Couture’s Design AtelierDiscover the dozen up-and-coming brands exhibiting in the Design Atelier for the first time.
SourcingJun 05, 2025
A Rare Suite of Rubies Has Arrived in Las VegasThe “Royal Ruby” Collection is a quintet of untreated rubies curated by collector Jack Abraham.
Events & AwardsJun 05, 2025
Daymond John to Give Keynote at JCK Las VegasThe entrepreneur and “Shark Tank” star will share his top tips for success.
MajorsJun 05, 2025
Platinum Guild International Updates Leadership TeamTwo existing executives have been given new roles.
Events & AwardsJun 05, 2025
Zillion Announces 'Women in STEM' Scholarship RecipientMeredith Tiderington, an electrical engineering student, was selected for the award.
Lab-GrownJun 04, 2025
GIA Reverting to More General Terminology for Lab-Grown DiamondsIt will quit assigning the stones specific color and clarity grades in favor of applying “new descriptive terminology.”
