Editors

Love but not necessarily marriage

EditorsJan 16, 2014

Love but not necessarily marriage

I don’t know why but I’ve always been fascinated with demographics and the differences among the generations: what were the cultural influences that shaped the ideals of those in their 60s versus those in their 20s and 30s.


This week I had the chance again to wade into my favorite topic working on this story about the number of weddings in 2014.

As I learned in doing the story, researchers anticipate 2.2 million weddings this year, 2 percent more than there were in 2013.

The marriage rate, overall, declined immediately following the recession but now seems to be bouncing back to pre-recession levels, though it’s still not what it was in the late 1970s through the early aughts, when there were as many as 2.5 million marriages a year, U.S. Census Bureau data shows.

Certainly, many marriages during this time frame is attributable to the fact that this is when many of the baby boomers, the large post-World War II generation born between 1946 and 1964, would have been getting married.

But this begs the question, what happened to all of their kids, the generation known as the Millennials or the Echo Boomers? Following many of their parents’ marriages in the 1980s, many members of this generation are now their 20s and even early 30s. What’s keeping them from tying the knot?

Among the easy answers, as I am sure you have read before, are the recession, which caused people to delay marriage because of financial uncertainty, and the increase in co-habitation among young people, which has become more socially acceptable.

It’s almost interesting to note, however, that young people today--not just members of the Millennial Generation but of those above it, Generation X, of which I am a (very young) member--take marriage very seriously.

Last March, the National Marriage Project at the University of Virginia published a report called “Knot Yet” examining the benefits and the downsides to what they term “delayed” marriage in the United States. (In the interest of full disclosure, I will mention that this report was sponsored by The National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy and also explores the increasing number of children born out of wedlock.)

In the report, they got into the rising average marriage age in the United States, which now stands at about 28 for men and 25 for women, and the whys behind it, noting that, “Marriage has shifted from being the cornerstone to the capstone of adult life. No longer the foundation on which young adults build their prospects for future prosperity and happiness, marriage now comes only after they have
moved toward financial and psychological independence. It’s not hard to understand this mindset, especially given that many of today’s young adults are children of divorce and express worry about divorce themselves; they view marriage as something that should not be undertaken without a suitable exit strategy.”

They also view marriage as more than just: I’ve reached this age therefore I must now select a husband or wife and move on to the next phase of my life.

They want to get married--they don’t view the institution as outdated--but they are looking for that ideal person to marry, a soul mate if you will. If they haven’t found him or her yet, so be it.

As one 37-year-old male friend of mine, who falls squarely into Generation X, put it:  “I want to make sure it’s right and not rush into anything and honestly don’t think I’ve even felt close (to finding the right person) ... Why rush into something [because] people think you should be married by a certain age ... And then get divorced or, like most of my friends, just [be unhappy].”

He said “no way” when I asked him if getting married is something he felt like he had to do. “Getting married to get married, that’s not fair to either person or the families.”

A woman 10 years his junior who lives in an entirely different part of the country expressed a similar sentiment.  “I think a lot of my friends are making absolutely sure they are with the right person by spending more than a few years together before deciding to get married,” she said.

Retailers, I would be curious for some of your input on this, as I am wondering how much it varies by region.

Are the couples you are seeing today older in general? If so, how does that impact their ring choice? And, are they a different shopper with different expectations and attitudes about the entire ring buying/marriage process as a whole?
Michelle Graffis the editor-in-chief at National Jeweler, directing the publication’s coverage both online and in print.

The Latest

Stock image of money
Policies & IssuesApr 28, 2026
Tariff Refunds: How to File, What to Expect

Importers can submit claims now to receive money back for the IEEPA tariffs they’ve paid, with refunds expected to take up to 90 days.

Gregory's Jewelers storefront
IndependentsApr 28, 2026
This North Carolina Jeweler Is Passing the Torch

The owners of Gregory Jewelers in Morganton, North Carolina, are heading into retirement.

Doug Hucker
SourcingApr 28, 2026
Doug Hucker Retires From ICA

The colored gemstone industry leader is heading into retirement after four years as the association’s CEO.

Antique Jewelry & Watch Show
Brought to you by
Discover Timeless Treasures: A Showcase of Antique Jewelry & Timepieces in Las Vegas

Gain access to the most exclusive and coveted antique pieces from trusted dealers during Las Vegas Jewelry Week.

Natural Diamond Council Chief Marketing Officer Susie Dewey
SourcingApr 28, 2026
NDC Hires Tapestry Exec to Head Global Marketing

Susie Dewey joins the Natural Diamond Council as its new chief marketing officer.

Weekly QuizApr 23, 2026
This Week’s Quiz
Test your jewelry news knowledge by answering these questions.
Take the Quiz
The Ocean Dream diamond
AuctionsApr 27, 2026
12 Years Later, the ‘Ocean Dream’ Diamond Resurfaces at Christie’s

The largest known fancy vivid blue-green diamond could fetch more than $12 million at its second auction appearance.

Smart Age Solutions CEO and National Jeweler columnist Emmanuel Raheb
ColumnistsApr 27, 2026
Stop Treating Mother’s Day Like an Afterthought

Emmanuel Raheb says jewelers need to start marketing early and make it easy for customers to pick a gift for mom.

lvajws image 1.jpg
Brought to you by
Las Vegas Antique Jewelry & Watch Show: Showcasing the Most Collectible Merchandise from Across the Globe

Gain access to the most exclusive and coveted antique pieces from trusted dealers during Las Vegas Jewelry Week.

Longnecker Jewelry storefront
IndependentsApr 27, 2026
Longnecker Jewelry Celebrates 30 Years

In honor of the milestone, the Nebraska jeweler has debuted Leslie & Co., its new in-house jewelry brand.

Jeff Corey
MajorsApr 27, 2026
JBT Re-Elects Jeff Corey as Board Chair

The trade organization, which held its annual elections earlier this year, also added five new board members.

Fourteen August Irene mom ring
SurveysApr 24, 2026
Mother’s Day 2026 Jewelry Spending to Top $7B, NRF Says

NRF’s annual survey found that 45 percent of consumers plan to purchase jewelry for a loved one this Mother’s Day.

TwentyFour Vault Locket
TechnologyApr 24, 2026
TwentyFour’s Digital-Age Locket Is a Virtual Vault

The “Vault” charm, our Piece of the Week, expands on the memories that can be stored in a locket by connecting to your phone.

Hamptons Jewelry Show exhibitors Maison Mèrenor, Jochen Leën, Studio Javo
Events & AwardsApr 24, 2026
Hamptons Jewelry Show to Return in July

The open-to-the-public luxury jewelry and timepiece show, in its second year, is slated for July 23-26.

Photos from Day’s Jewelers 2025 Mother’s Day campaign
IndependentsApr 23, 2026
Meet the Real Moms of Day’s Jewelers

The jeweler’s Mother’s Day campaign highlights the women who work there—mothers, grandmothers, women who want to be mothers, and dog moms.

National Jeweler - Supplier Bulletin - April 2026 - JMSS Graphic.jpg
Supplier BulletinApr 23, 2026
JM® Shipping Solution: Smarter Shipping for High-Value Goods

Sponsored by Jewelers Mutual

Woman wearing Charles & Colvard lab grown diamond jewelry
Lab-GrownApr 23, 2026
Charles & Colvard May Sell Assets for $1.5M

The proposed agreement follows the moissanite maker’s Chapter 11 bankruptcy protection filing last month.

John Jacob Astor IV’s Titanic pocket watch and a gold pencil case
AuctionsApr 23, 2026
John Jacob Astor IV’s Titanic Pocket Watch Fetches $1M

The Patek Philippe for Tiffany & Co. timepiece Astor brought aboard the ill-fated ship sold for double its estimate at a Freeman’s auction.

Adam Neeley Dali Garden Collection Eyris Ring
CollectionsApr 23, 2026
Adam Neeley’s High Jewelry Collection Steps Into Salvador Dalí’s Garden

The “Dalí’s Garden” collection was inspired by a surreal dream Neeley had after cooking a recipe from Salvador Dalí’s 1973 cookbook.

Natalie Feanny
IndependentsApr 23, 2026
Windsor Jewelers Names New Buying Director

Natalie Feanny has been appointed to the role.

Stock image of a gavel and books
CrimeApr 22, 2026
New Mexico Couple Pleads Guilty to Selling Fake Native American Jewelry

The pair falsely claimed their jewelry was made by Navajo artists, but it was imported from Vietnam.

Roberta Flack: Style, Art, & Music Auction Bulgari Collar
AuctionsApr 22, 2026
Roberta Flack’s Jewelry Is Going Up for Auction

Julien’s Auctions is selling the musician’s fine and fashion jewelry alongside her clothing, gold records, and other memorabilia.

Rachel King and The Tudor Heart book cover
CollectionsApr 22, 2026
British Museum Curator Pens Book on ‘The Tudor Heart’

Rachel King’s book dives into the history of the pendant believed to have belonged to Henry VIII and his first wife, Katherine of Aragon.

Henry Kessler, Vance Kessler, Alex Kessler, and Daniel Kessler of Sy Kessler Sales Inc.
Events & AwardsApr 22, 2026
Here’s What Sy Kessler Has on Tap for Las Vegas

The company will have deals on precious metals testers as well as the latest in lab-grown diamond detection technology and security.

Chanel Coco Game Haute Horlogerie Chessboard
WatchesApr 21, 2026
Coco Chanel Enters the Game with New Watch Collection

Gabrielle “Coco” Chanel is a character in the “Coco Game” collection of watches and the queen in its first haute horlogerie chessboard.

Jewelers of America 20 Under 40 winners collage
IndependentsApr 21, 2026
Meet Jewelers of America’s 2026 ‘20 Under 40’ Class

The annual list honors rising professionals on the retail and supply sides of the jewelry industry.

Fake Fendi bangle
CrimeApr 21, 2026
Customs Nabs 1,500 Pieces of Counterfeit Jewelry Bound for NYC

Seized in Kentucky, the packages include fake Cartier, Tiffany & Co., Chanel, and Fendi jewelry.

Stock image of a judge’s gavel
CrimeApr 20, 2026
Queens Man Convicted in Bludgeoning Death of Pawn Shop Owner

Rodolfo Lopez-Portillo faces 25 years to life in prison after being found guilty in the March 2022 beating death of Arasb Shoughi.

×

This site uses cookies to give you the best online experience. By continuing to use & browse this site, we assume you agree to our Privacy Policy