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Exercising Tolerance and Respect on Social Media

OtherFeb 24, 2016

Exercising Tolerance and Respect on Social Media

Peter Smith says retailers need to be respectful when engaging in sensitive discussions on social media, or they run the risk of losing customers, vendors or employees with opposing viewpoints.

The tragic events that unfolded in San Bernardino on Dec. 2 were a horrible reminder that we live in a very difficult and complex world. We must not only contend with wars in the Middle East that are wholly different from anything previous generations would have experienced, but also the ever-present specter of tragedy in our own midst from people that, quite frankly, might have been shopping next to us in the grocery store the day before, or might have been our own neighbors.


Much as we like to simplify and categorize, the face of evil has no particular look or ethnicity or belief system. Those despicable people who think nothing of taking innocent lives in movie theaters, schools, churches and places of business have no single face. They look like James Holmes in Aurora, Seung-Hui-Cho at Virginia Tech, Dylan Roof in Charleston, Adam Lanza in Sandy Hook, Aaron Alexis in D.C., Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold at Columbine, and Syed Rizwan Farook and his wife Tashfeen Malik in San Bernardino.

While the debate will rage on about how to stop these lunatics, what there can surely be no debating is the level of incivility and, all too frequently, vitriol that is unleashed by people about guns and gun violence after each one of these terrible events.

This column on National Jeweler is clearly not the place to offer opinions or perspectives on that topic, but it is worth reminding everyone that we ought to be able to engage in reasoned and respectful discussion on this and other sensitive topics without descending into attacks via social media against anyone who dares to weigh in with a viewpoint that differs from ours.

Here’s a newsflash: Your customers don’t agree with you on all sensitive matters. It is probably fair to speculate that about half of your customers will hold opposing views to you on many matters of sensitivity, be it politics, guns, religion, abortion or equality in marriage.

I’ll refrain from suggesting that we ought to celebrate our differences on these and other equally sensitive topics. Forget that--I’m not interested in celebrating a viewpoint with which I fundamentally disagree.

What we should do, however, is afford each other the common courtesy and the respect not to resort to petty name-calling or labeling because you disagree with someone’s position on an issue. We should not ascend the stairs

of the bully pulpit to attack people who have different opinions than us, and if we cannot engage in reasonable conversation about our differences, we should disengage on that particular topic.

Social media can be an interesting platform to discuss all manner of things if it is done in a respectful manner. I mean, do we really want to see our preferred platforms become all about what somebody had for dinner or what airport they are in right now? I very much enjoy reading articles that are posted from my contacts and it’s OK if I don’t always agree with them. I expect no less from my contacts; they are free to read or not read my postings and welcome to comment or not comment on them.

What we should not be OK with is tolerance of incivility or cyber-bullying from people who are so hell-bent on their own position that they don’t mind who they offend. Civil discourse is really not such a bad thing … it usually works out pretty well and generally doesn’t strip anyone’s dignity or sense of whom or what they believe.

Unless you are currently posting signs on your door uninviting customers, employees and vendors who do not share your views on all matters, it’s just not smart business to be disrespectful on social media.

Peter Smith, author of Hiring Squirrels: 12 Essential Interview Questions to Uncover Great Retail Sales Talent, has spent more than 30 years building sales teams at retail and at wholesale. He is president of Vibhor Gems and he has previously worked with companies such as Tiffany & Co., Montblanc and Hearts On Fire. Email him at peter@vibhorgems.com, dublinsmith@yahoo.com or reach him on LinkedIn.

Michelle Graffis the editor-in-chief at National Jeweler, directing the publication’s coverage both online and in print.

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