Independents

Coach’s Corner: Good Days and Bad Days

IndependentsAug 09, 2018

Coach’s Corner: Good Days and Bad Days

Pat Henneberry recently found herself in a dark place. She shares five tips on how she pulled herself out of her funk.

2016_Pat-Henneberry-NEW.jpg
Pat Henneberry is vice president of global learning and development at Hearts On Fire. She also is founder of The Jewelry Coach, a sales training community for jewelers. Reach her at pat@thejewelrycoach.com.

Let’s get real: You can’t always put on a smile, and sometimes you have bad days.

However if you’re in sales, you need to stay confident even in low times. Being confident is the most important thing you can do, yet sometimes is the most difficult. But one thing I know to be true is once you believe in what you’re doing, you focus and dig deep, you can find the confidence.

For some people, that’s easier said than done.

I recently had a setback with my health. I went from playing tennis every day, riding my bike, doing stand-up paddle boarding and trail running to an unexpected back surgery that landed me literally on my back, with a long recovery. My life as I knew it changed in a matter of moments, and I found myself slipping down a dark rabbit hole (yes, me, Pat Henneberry the inspirational speaker, was at a low point trying to dig out.)

Please understand I am not comparing my situation with the acute suffering of others; things could’ve been a lot worse and I realize how lucky I am. But let’s face it—there are times that suck in our lives and from which it is difficult to recover. It’s times like these that make it hard to believe in our skills and abilities, that can mess with you quickly before you know what’s happening.

So, here are five scientifically proven and Pat-backed ways that have helped me recover and can help you be more confident at work and in life.

Dress for Success
It’s easy to underestimate the effect of clothing.

You shower and get dressed every day, but you might not realize that your wardrobe could be influencing your confidence and mindset. A new pair of running shoes always make me run faster. A new pair of socks are miracle workers on the tennis court.

One study found that wearing formal attire changes people’s thought processes, stating: “Putting on formal clothes makes us feel powerful, and that changes the basic way we see the world.”

In short, dress to impress. Revamp and rework outfits you already have, purchase the better-quality dress or suit, and make sure you feel like the best version of yourself in your new threads.

Even when I was on in the hospital on my back, I wanted to dress in clothes every day. No dresses, but a T-shirt

and shorts made me feel better than a hospital gown. I would try to pick a funny T-shirt for the day. My favorite had, “I am only talking to my dog today” printed on it, which leads me to my next point.

Find Humor
Trust me, finding humor when you are in pain is no fun.

I believe I did get some humor DNA from my mother. My mom is the funniest person I know and I’ve seen her in some pretty bad situations through my life.

When I asked her how she pulled out of them and what the secret was to her 60-year marriage with my dad, humor was her answer. If you can find a moment to be funny in a not-so-good time it will help.

I remember in the hospital there was a Dry-Erase board with all kinds of nurse lingo and different letters that meant nothing to me, so I had a friend write in big letters BYOB. Every nurse who came in would look at it and laugh. It made me laugh too and for a moment it gave me confidence.

Learn from Constructive Criticism
Criticism can be tough if you focus on the negatives and get caught up in your missteps rather than focusing on your accomplishments over your entire career.

So, what can you do to remain positive? Filter criticism and remind yourself that it can help you improve your skills, work and relationships over time. Thank the person for their feedback and seek solutions to address it and remember, not all criticism is true. Take it in and move on.

Listen to Music
You already know that music can affect your mood, but did you know that certain kinds of music can influence your self-esteem too? A study from the Kellogg School of Management at Northwestern University found that different types of songs impact confidence.

Listening to one of my up-tempo running playlists gets me going and helps me complete a task more successfully. The songs I find to be my most empowering including “Happy” by Pharrell; “September” by Earth Wind and Fire; “Get Ready for This” by 2 Unlimited; and “In Da Club” by 50 Cent (researchers attribute this song’s ability to motivate to heavier bass levels.)

The next time you’re getting ready for a job interview or a big presentation, just queue up Spotify, Amazon Music or Pandora.

Sit Up Straight
Your posture is important for more than just your physical health; it can also affect your confidence, according to researchers. According to my mom, you need to sit up straight and stop slouching or you will have back issues later in life (she was right; see above.)

We tend to assume our confidence is coming from own thoughts; we don’t realize our posture is affecting how much they believe in what we’re thinking and how people perceive us.

Everyone experiences periods of insecurity and anxiety, but allowing it to run your life will only hurt you in the workplace. Be confident in who you are and your ability to accomplish goals.

Conclusion
When I was at my lowest, lying on the bed in my doctor’s office, the pain was so bad that I couldn’t sit up. I was going down a dark hole fast.

My doctor looked at me and said, “Pat, you will have good days and bad days, but you will be OK.”

You too will have good days and bad days, and my hope for you is that you find your way back after a bad day.

So, put on a great outfit, tell a joke, turn up the volume on one of your favorite songs and stand up straight.

Pat Henneberry is vice president of global learning and development at Hearts On Fire. She also is founder of The Jewelry Coach, a sales training community for jewelers. Reach her at pat@thejewelrycoach.com.
Pat Henneberryis a strategic consultant, speaker, and trainer.

The Latest

Studs pop-up
MajorsMay 20, 2024
Studs Opens Luxury Piercing Pop-Up in NYC

“Fancy Studs” will feature revamped branding and a new lab-grown diamond fine jewelry collection.

Nivoda executive team at table
SourcingMay 20, 2024
2 Business-to-Business Platforms Secure Millions in Funding

Nivoda and Liquid Diamonds both have big plans for the new capital.

Stuller Packaging & Displays 2024-2025 catalog
MajorsMay 20, 2024
Stuller Issues New Packaging & Display Catalog

The 2024-2025 edition features new colors and styles, as well as storytelling elements.

1872 x 1052 Gemolite.jpg
Brought to you by
Meet Gemology’s Next Generation Microscope: GIA® Gemolite® NXT Professional Edition

GIA®’s most advanced microscope has new features to optimize greater precision and comfort.

Elephants wading in the Okavango Delta in Botswana
SourcingMay 20, 2024
State of the Diamond Industry: Botswana Beyond Diamonds

From moringa to ecotourism in the Okavango Delta, the country and its leaders are exploring how Botswana can diversify its economy.

Weekly QuizMay 16, 2024
This Week’s Quiz
Test your jewelry news knowledge by answering these seven questions.
Take the Quiz
Rough diamonds from De Beers
SourcingMay 20, 2024
Anglo American Confirms It Is Looking to Sell De Beers

The mining giant also wants to offload its platinum business as part of an overhaul designed to “unlock significant value.”

Buccellati jewelry
FinancialsMay 17, 2024
Richemont Appoints Van Cleef & Arpels’ Nicolas Bos as New CEO

The announcement coincided with its full-year results, with growth driven by its jewelry brands.

Royal Chain gold chains
Brought to you by
Record Gold Prices Have Consumers Undeterred. Here’s Why.

Despite the rising prices, consumers continue to seek out the precious metal.

Watches of Switzerland Mall of America store
FinancialsMay 17, 2024
Watches of Switzerland’s Fiscal-Year Sales Flat

Looking ahead, the retailer said it sees “enormous potential” in Roberto Coin’s ability to boost its branded jewelry business.

My Next Question webinar series graphic
Recorded WebinarsMay 17, 2024
Watch: Preparing for Trade Show Success

Jewelry trade show veterans share strategies for engaging buyers, managing your time effectively, and packing the right shoes.

Cartier ring-tailed lemur brooch circa 1991
AuctionsMay 17, 2024
Piece of the Week: Cartier’s Ring-Tailed Lemur

This little guy’s name is Ricky and he just sold for more than $200,000 at Sotheby’s Geneva jewelry auction.

202.18 carat fancy intense yellow diamond The Yellow Rose
AuctionsMay 16, 2024
Christie’s Holds 2 Sales Despite Cyberattack

Though its website has been down for a week, Christie’s proceeded with its jewelry and watch auctions on May 13-14, bringing in nearly $80 million.

The Allnatt yellow diamond
AuctionsMay 16, 2024
Sotheby’s Withdraws 101-Carat Yellow Diamond from Auction

Despite the absence of “The Allnatt,” Sotheby’s Geneva jewelry auction totaled $34 million, with 90 percent of lots sold.

National Jeweler columnist Lilian Raji
ColumnistsMay 16, 2024
The PR Adviser: What the Designer Should’ve Done

Lilian Raji gives advice to designers on how to make the most of great publicity opportunities.

Mothae Diamond Mine Lesotho
SourcingMay 16, 2024
Lucapa to Shed Stake in Lesotho Diamond Mine

The mining company wants to divest its 70 percent holding in the Mothae Diamond Mine in an effort to streamline its portfolio.

National Jeweler columnist Peter Smith
ColumnistsMay 15, 2024
Squirrel Spotting: Why Retailers Struggle to Fire Brands

Why do so many jewelers keep lines that are not selling? Peter Smith thinks the answer lies in these two behavioral principles.

The Argyle Phoenix red diamond
AuctionsMay 15, 2024
Red Diamond Breaks Records at Phillips Geneva

The “Argyle Phoenix” sold for more than $4 million at the auction house’s second jewels sale.

Jewelers of America 20 Under 40 2024 recipients
Events & AwardsMay 15, 2024
See Who’s in JA’s 2024 ‘20 Under 40’ Class

The annual list recognizes young professionals making an impact in jewelry retail.

Brilliant Earth Logan Hollowell jewelry collection
FinancialsMay 15, 2024
Brilliant Earth’s Sales Fall Flat in Q1

While overall sales were sluggish, the retailer said its non-bridal fine jewelry was a popular choice for Valentine’s Day.

The Yellow Rose and the Allnatt yellow diamonds
AuctionsMay 14, 2024
2 Huge Yellow Diamonds Are Heading to Auction

Christie's is selling one of the diamonds, moving forward with its Geneva jewelry auction despite the cyberattack that took down its website.

Born Leaders Platinum Born campaign
MajorsMay 14, 2024
Platinum Born Taps ‘Born Leaders’ for New Campaign

The ad aims to position platinum jewelry as ideal for everyday wear.

Instappraise Trifold Brochure
GradingMay 14, 2024
Instappraise Adds Trifold Brochure to Appraisal Offerings

Retailers can customize and print the appraisal brochures from their store.

White, pink, and blue lab-grown diamonds from Lightbox
Lab-GrownMay 13, 2024
Lab-Grown Diamond Brand Lightbox Cuts Prices by 25 to 40%

The move follows a price-drop test run in Q4 and comes with the addition of a “quality assurance card” from GIA for some loose diamonds.

Christie’s New York
TechnologyMay 13, 2024
Christie’s Website Brought Down by Hackers, Watch Auction Postponed

The site has been down since Thursday evening, just ahead of its spring auctions.

Madeleine K. Albright’s Patriotic Leopard Brooch
AuctionsMay 13, 2024
Madeleine Albright’s Jewelry, Pins a White-Glove Sale at Freeman’s | Hindman

The late former U.S. Secretary’s collection went for quadruple the sale’s pre-sale estimate.

Kimberly Adams Russell
IndependentsMay 10, 2024
Frank Adams Jewelers Names New CEO

Kimberly Adams Russell is taking over the role from her father, David Adams, marking the third generation to hold the title.

Birth of Venus necklace
CollectionsMay 10, 2024
Piece of the Week: Carina Hardy’s ‘Birth of Venus’ Necklace

As a token of womanhood, this necklace depicts when Venus was born from the sea.

×

This site uses cookies to give you the best online experience. By continuing to use & browse this site, we assume you agree to our Privacy Policy